 |
| No Can Do! |
Driving alone in my car (with windows up), or in the shower, I can carry a pretty good note, but publicly on a stage, not so much. So I asked the Lord if He would anoint my voice so that I can fulfill my dream of being a singer like the rest of my family. After all, the Bible says to ask and it shall be given... for everyone that asks receives. I even told the Lord that I would travel the world singing and He would not even have to pay me to do it. I would sing for free if He could get me to the stage and back home. And I meant that. My motivation was not to use the gift to become wealthy, I just wanted to sing. Period. I thought because my motivation was pure, He should be okay with it.
Time passed (and passed) and my many attempts at singing outside the shower proved futile. In other words, I failed miserably at the singing thing and God was pretty silent about it for a while.
Finally, one day, the Lord explained why He would not let me sing.
"Baby, your whole life I raised you up to be a teacher. I let you endure things even as a child that would enhance your gift and skills. I instilled in you the study gene and all the necessary tools that enable you to study My word in depth. If I make you a singer now, it will be a great distraction, pulling you away from everything I have built up in you. I am sorry sweetheart, Daddy cannot make you a singer."I felt His disappointment, that He had to turn me down. I knew what He said was truth. If He allowed me to sing, I would be too busy writing lyrics, rehearsing and performing to actually give myself over to the study of His word. It was disappointing but I gave up the notion of singing out in public.
Now, fast forward a few years. I was driving to work early one morning and a song came on the radio by The Canton Spirituals called Heavenly Choir. I was listening to the story and I heard the voice of the Lord say, "I'm going to let you sing in the heavenly choir." I gasped! Instinctively, I knew that He meant in the hereafter, I would be a member of His heavenly choir. I said, "Lord, You're going to let me sing in the heavenly choir?" He said, "I'm going to let you lead songs in the heavenly choir." I was speechless and emotions welled up so that I almost had to pull over. Tears were flowing down my face and I forced myself to pull it together before I caused a traffic accident.
When I finally got straightened out, I said, "Lord, I am deeply honored... and this more than makes up for not being the next Whitney Houston, here on my earthly pass-through." (In the shower, I always sound just like her. LOL!)
Romans 8:28 states, "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose."
When I turned 50, I suggested to the Holy Spirit that if we were going to be able to really accomplish a lot before I died, we should probably get this show on the road. I have less years left to live, than have already been lived. I know He called me to be a Bible teacher but it didn't seem to be progressing as quickly as I wanted. His response was that if I thought my gifts ended with my death, then I was thinking too small. I believe God's heavenly kingdom will be an extension of the church that we now see, with spiritual gifts still in operation.
In regard to my prayer to be a singer, the answer was no-can-do. But in my opinion, it couldn't have turned out any better, because I am still wow'd by the fact that He will let "me" lead songs in "His" heavenly choir. (SMH) Even the Lord's no, is just like a yes.
And we have a song that the angels can't sing, because only the redeemed can say, "I am redeemed."
Go in peace.