Is The Lord Among Us Or Not?

Is The Lord Among Us Or Not?

I want deliverance to come so badly. I cannot stop the tears from flowing today. I have prayed and prayed and prayed and prayed and prayed, but I cannot seem to get deliverance. Heaven has shut its doors to me. I keep knocking but He won't answer - no matter what. I keep trying to remind myself that God keeps His promises and that if I wait on Him, He will come through for me. But the wait goes on forever and He will not be moved. I feel so all alone. I feel like my world is crumbling but God will not be moved still. He has turned His back on me and I don't know what to do. Proverbs 18:24 says He is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. The Scripture also says that He is a very present help in trouble (Ps. 46:1), so why am I in this thing alone. Matthew said if we seek God's kingdom first that all these things will be added to us (Matt. 6:33). But God is not responding either way.

Exod. 17:1-7 (1) Then all the congregation of the children of Israel set out on their journey from the Wilderness of Sin, according to the commandment of the Lord, and camped in Rephidim; but there was no water for the people to drink. (2) Therefore the people contended with Moses, and said, “Give us water, that we may drink.” So Moses said to them, “Why do you contend with me? Why do you tempt the Lord?” (3) And the people thirsted there for water, and the people complained against Moses, and said, “Why is it you have brought us up out of Egypt, to kill us and our children and our livestock with thirst?” (4) So Moses cried out to the Lord, saying, “What shall I do with this people? They are almost ready to stone me!” (5) And the Lord said to Moses, “Go on before the people, and take with you some of the elders of Israel. Also take in your hand your rod with which you struck the river, and go. (6) Behold, I will stand before you there on the rock in Horeb; and you shall strike the rock, and water will come out of it, that the people may drink.” And Moses did so in the sight of the elders of Israel. (7) So he called the name of the place Massah and Meribah, because of the contention of the children of Israel, and because they tempted the Lord, saying, “Is the Lord among us or not?”

I know in my heart that I love the Lord, but there are times when I can't seem to reconcile the love in my heart with the feeling of neglect. His silence is more than I can endure. I am trying so hard to walk in the Spirit and follow the path that is out in front of me. But that path just seems to lead me deeper and deeper into the woods. I am wondering where is that very present help.

Ps. 46:1 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.

I just wished I knew why He won't answer me... why won't He even acknowledge my prayers. I feel like I have been faithful but my faith has not worked and now I am just hurting so badly that the God I have sought with all my heart and soul is no where to be found. I have taught others that if you seek Him with all your might, He will be found by you.

Jer. 29:13 And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.

I wished I had a happy ending to to this blog, but I do not. I want my relationship and my fellowship with the Lord to be strong, to be close, like two best friends. I am at my wit's end. Peter said, "Lord where else can we go, You have the words of eternal life?"

Somebody sung a song... But Before You Let The Devil Win Go Back And Pray Again.

Here I go to pray... again.

Go in peace.